The Lighter Side of Weight Loss: Chapter Fifty

Chapter Fifty: Use Your Noodle

 

Finally, an email arrived from The Universe! I have long questioned why I am overweight and underpaid. The Universe, tiring of my whining, left this message in my Inbox: You are underpaid because you don’t have a job. Get one! You are overweight because you haven’t been using your noodle. Use it! 

Therefore, I started using my turquoise blue, 52 inch long pool noodle. I do my best critical thinking while floating in a sensory deprivation pool, otherwise known as The Mon Valley Fitness Center. Some of my thoughts while noodle boarding (similar to paddle boarding, but the noodle is above you): I should write a book called Weight Loss for Dummies. I should not have watched the pool scene in Passengers with Jennifer Lawrence and Chris Pratt. Trust me, you do not want the 800 gallons of water enveloping you to lose its gravitational pull! Chris Pratt enveloping you, with or without gravity, would not be a bad thing. I wonder if my noodle (brain) is made of Polyethylene Foam.

Since I often have both the 90 degree Fahrenheit therapy pool and frigid lap pool all to myself, I can immerse myself in WW 101. I can plan meals, meditate, workout, change habits and shift my mindset; all while using my noodle. Brainstorming with myself is challenging, but often rewarding.

For example, I recently attended a Halloween party at Mariner's Hall, a club where on Monday nights, I try to learn line dancing. I agonized over whether I should wear my Raggedy Ann costume because it made me look like Plus Size Ann! Actually, I can’t blame it on the costume. Anyway, I wore the costume and couldn’t have been more surprised. People loved it, took pictures of me and reminisced about a favorite Raggedy Ann from days long ago. They didn’t see me as I saw myself. They saw a smiling woman having fun, wearing a prize worthy costume. 

I learned a valuable lesson at that Halloween party. I learned to wear the costume, to buy the bathing suit (in any color but black), to have fun every day, to publish an article on my blog (reminder: I'm sensitive to criticism) and to use my noodle!

Until next time, to all my Weight Watcher readers and friends, just know that I will share my noodle with you! See you in the pool, email me or leave a comment. We can achieve our goals together!

 

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Sandra Warholic Seeley - All my life, and half of someone else's, I have lived in a humorous place called Earth. My muse is a tiny menehune from the island of Oahu in Hawaii where I lived for a year. Ernest Hemingway once sat under the exact same coconut tree where I did most of my writing. I'm also a sensitive to criticism Virgo who loves to get paid for writing and speaking funny stuff. Even though my mind is filled with volcanic ash residue and I'm still finding sand in my shorts, I will continue to write until my muse retires or I run out of pretty blue drinks, whichever comes first. Don't be bashful, email the author.